Talk:Kevin Rudd/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Nominator: DTH89 (talk · contribs) 12:55, 5 May 2024 (UTC)

Reviewer: MatthewDalhousie (talk · contribs) 06:11, 29 May 2024 (UTC)

About the lead

It's a terrific article. But that lead is very, very long.

Thanks for the note, I've condensed the lede as best I can while retaining key info. Let me know what you think and let me know if you have any other notes you would like me to address. DTH89 (talk · contribs) 10:55, 30 May 2024 (UTC)

Good stuff @DTH89. Keen to support you on the road to GA. Three things:

1. I believe there is only one former Aussie PM's article to achieve GA status, and that intro is about 550 words. I reckon you need to lose another 100. It really comes down to compressing stories. For example, mention the spill, but you don't need "His removal from office began a sequence of four subsequent prime ministers who would all be removed by their own parties before completing their full first term" - that can all go in the main body I reckon.

2. I like how you called it the lede. Old school.

3. Small thing, but I reckon the quality of the photos makes a big difference in making the leap to good. I would look at trimming some of the images, so it's much clearer who is in them.

That's plenty for now! Happy to join in and trim some time in the future. MatthewDalhousie (talk) 13:17, 30 May 2024 (UTC)

(I certainly [https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Australian_Prime_Minister_Anthony_Albanese_visits_Arlington_National_Cemetery_where_he_placed_a_wreath_at_the_Tomb_of_the_Unknown_Soldier_on_October_23,_2023_43_(cropped).jpg recommend using this image], tells a story about the crossover of the subject's career.) MatthewDalhousie (talk) 00:31, 31 May 2024 (UTC)

Hey mate, all done. Thanks for the all the feedback, and keep me posted with the GA review. DTH89 (talk · contribs) 10:54, 31 May 2024 (UTC)

Okay, so I think this is really improving. I'll just list some of the images that I think are on the better side, either because of their picture quality or because they they support the story in the article. The first four are shots that support the domestic politics material:

1. As Foreign Minister with Australian Army medical team in Pakistan, August 2010 [1]
2. With Kim Beazley in Melbourne and US diplomats, November 2010 [2]
3. Surprising shot with UK PM and Chancellor of Germany, February 2011 [3]
4. Campaigning in Brisbane in August 2013 [4]
5. PM again, in Balmain, having won reform to the leadership voting system, July 2013 [5]
6. With President Obama [6]

MatthewDalhousie (talk) 01:09, 3 June 2024 (UTC)

Hi, apologies for the delayed response. I have added some of the photos you have suggested where I could find an appropiate space for them. Let me know if there is anything else I can do, @MatthewDalhousie. DTH89 (talk) 07:48, 14 June 2024 (UTC)

I think those trimmed images look a whole lot better. I did remove one - from Chatham House - which I think is just a bad shot of the bloke. But that's compensated by the shots with Obama and others. Would be good to find an image of him early in his Parliamentary life, but I looked around and haven't found anything so far. Keep going! MatthewDalhousie (talk) 09:21, 14 June 2024 (UTC)

@DTH89, @MatthewDalhousie Just an observer here. I've noticed that this GA review has gone stagnant with no activity for over a month. I wouldn't want to see this article failed yet and think it's a perfect candidate for GA status, so here's a little bump as a reminder to hopefully get things back on track. I know there's no strict deadline for these reviews, but better safe than sorry! ThatRandomGuy1 (talk) 02:46, 21 July 2024 (UTC)

Thanks for the ping @ThatRandomGuy1. I have been busy with other things lately, but I definitely haven't forgotten about this! @MatthewDalhousie, I will add some additional pictures, let me know what you think. DTH89 (talk) 13:07, 21 July 2024 (UTC)

Yes, thank you @ThatRandomGuy1. I guess I'm involved now! Any quick thoughts on what might improve the article overall? MatthewDalhousie (talk) 04:11, 22 July 2024 (UTC)

@DTH89 just tried to break up the sentences in the lede, to improve readability. See what you think. MatthewDalhousie (talk) 09:34, 8 August 2024 (UTC)

@DTH89, I realise the towering irony of what I'm about to say, but when you look at how readable the article on Julia Gillard is (and we must remember, that article is assessed as a Good Article already) some of it comes from the interesting variations in the writing. However, in the current state of the Kevin Rudd article features repeated patterns of language. For example, 20 of the paragraphs begin with the word Rudd. Might have been more. I lost count. My point is, I'd be happy to try and find ways of keeping the writing fresh throughout the pice. But let me know if I'm barking up the wrong tree here. MatthewDalhousie (talk) 00:30, 12 August 2024 (UTC)