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==Pre-GA Review== |
==Pre-GA Review== |
Revision as of 20:06, 27 May 2008
This is the talk page for discussing improvements to the Backlash (2006) article. This is not a forum for general discussion of the article's subject. |
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Pre-GA Review
Lead
The reference for the PPV's theme song is indeed there, but I cannot find the tagline in that reference.
Background
There should only be 2-3 references per topic, in the first paragraph of the background, we have "[8][9][10][11]"The main feud heading into Backlash was the Triple Threat match between John Cena, Triple H and Edge -- the main feud was a match? The main feud was between Cena, HHH, and Edge for the title. The words "the Triple Threat match" should be removed.It culminated when Triple H won the number one contender spot to face WWE Champion John Cena at WrestleMania 22 -- should say The feud began when Triple H won the number one contender spot to face WWE Champion John Cena at WrestleMania 22As WrestleMania took place, Cena defeated Triple H, when he made him submit to the STFU. -- should say At WrestleMania, Cena defeated Triple H, when he made him submit to the STFU. Only "when he made him submit to the STFU" bothers me as well. He and him should be specified, and it should be mentioned what the STFU is, even though it is wiki-linked.- I think I got it. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 22:43, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- You got it. iMatthew 2008 22:53, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- I think I got it. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 22:43, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
Edge, in the beginning of 2006, became WWE Champion when he cashed in his Money in the Bank title shot at New Year's Revolution by giving Cena two Spears. -- should say Edge became WWE Champion at New Year's Revolution when he cashed in his Money in the Bank title shot. - the spear is not notable.- Shouldn't it say that he beat Cena at NYR? -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 22:43, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- I guess, how about Edge became WWE Champion at New Year's Revolution when he cashed in his Money in the Bank title shot, defeating John Cena.
- That works. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 22:53, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- I guess, how about Edge became WWE Champion at New Year's Revolution when he cashed in his Money in the Bank title shot, defeating John Cena.
- Shouldn't it say that he beat Cena at NYR? -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 22:43, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
Michaels interrupted McMahon and told him to "let it go" and "move on". - needs a reference, or should be removed.
Event
"HEAT match" - only "Heat" should be wiki-linked, not "match".The second and third paragraphs need to be combined.land hard on her right arm - saying that she landed hard seems like a person opinion, I think it should just say land right on her armtaunting Kane with "May 19" -- please explain the significance of "May 19" to Kane.- I think I got it. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 22:52, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- Where is it? iMatthew 2008 22:57, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- In the event part. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 23:03, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- The part about that match says The next match was The Big Show versus Kane, which ended in a no-contest after a red hue covered the ring and voices from the speakers in the arena began taunting Kane with "May 19" and Big Show who seemed to have enough, hit Kane with a steel chair and walked away Nowhere in that does it explain why May 19th would taunt Kane. iMatthew 2008 23:06, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- As I've been reading, Kane didn't reveal the "May 19" info. after Backlash. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 23:11, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- Then I'd say give a reference from anytime after Backlash that explains this. iMatthew 2008 23:15, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- How 'bout now? -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 23:20, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- That works. iMatthew 2008 23:23, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- How 'bout now? -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 23:20, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- Then I'd say give a reference from anytime after Backlash that explains this. iMatthew 2008 23:15, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- As I've been reading, Kane didn't reveal the "May 19" info. after Backlash. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 23:11, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- The part about that match says The next match was The Big Show versus Kane, which ended in a no-contest after a red hue covered the ring and voices from the speakers in the arena began taunting Kane with "May 19" and Big Show who seemed to have enough, hit Kane with a steel chair and walked away Nowhere in that does it explain why May 19th would taunt Kane. iMatthew 2008 23:06, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- In the event part. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 23:03, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- Where is it? iMatthew 2008 22:57, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- I think I got it. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 22:52, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
between Vince and Shane McMahon, and Shawn Michaels and God. -- how about between Vince and Shane McMahon, versus Shawn Michaels and God.the older McMahon -- should be VinceMichaels own finisher in the second to last paragraph in the event section, needs an apostrophe after the "s" in Michaels.Same spot, on top of a tall ladder. should just read on top of a ladder. By calling it tall is a personal opinion.All three men, however, were simply trying to destroy each other. another person opinion, should be removed.
Aftermath
The first sentence of the second paragraph needs a reference.- There is a ref. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 22:34, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- Following the aftermath from Backlash, Kane was confronted by an Imposter Kane, who was wearing Kane's old mask and ring attire. the next sentence has a ref, The Impostor chokeslammed Kane during his match against Shelton Benjamin for the Intercontinental Championship.[36] but that is about the chokeslam. iMatthew 2008 22:38, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- Oh. I will look for one. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 22:45, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- Does the ref. work? -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 23:10, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- Oh. I will look for one. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 22:45, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- Following the aftermath from Backlash, Kane was confronted by an Imposter Kane, who was wearing Kane's old mask and ring attire. the next sentence has a ref, The Impostor chokeslammed Kane during his match against Shelton Benjamin for the Intercontinental Championship.[36] but that is about the chokeslam. iMatthew 2008 22:38, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- There is a ref. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 22:34, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
Results
The match notes need a reference.- Isn't the event sourced with refs? -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 22:46, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- I'm sorry, my mistake, I meant the results sections. iMatthew 2008 22:54, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- Got it. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 22:59, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- I'm sorry, my mistake, I meant the results sections. iMatthew 2008 22:54, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
- Isn't the event sourced with refs? -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 22:46, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
Pictures
There should not be a period at the end of the captions in the pictures, since none of them are sentences.
That's as much as I could find for now, If there are any concerns, let me know on my talk page, or reply here. iMatthew 2008 22:35, 10 April 2008 (UTC)
It's ready! Feel free to give your one week warning to WP:PW. iMatthew 2008`
On review - Thursday
I will be reviewing this article on Thursday, sorry for the delay, ive been busy and dont like to review while im stressed out of respect to the editers. I will see you in two days. Cheers --Realist2 (Come Speak To Me) 23:11, 20 May 2008 (UTC)
OK, im going to review it now, i add bits piece by piece, please DO NOT start making corrections until i have indicted that im finished. There is plently of time to get things sorted. Cheers.
Review
- The "Report" heading seems pointless, that does it exactly mean any way, i think it would be best to turn the three subheadings into proper headings with == on either side.
- The main feud was between John Cena, Triple H, and Edge for the WWE Championship. The feud began when Triple H won the number one contender spot to face WWE Champion John Cena at WrestleMania 22.[12] - can be joined to make one sentance, a little stuby
- Weeks before their scheduled match, the two continuously feuded with one another.[13] - Feuded, that word doesnt sound right, im sure these a better word
- At WrestleMania, Cena defeated Triple H, when he forced Triple H to submit with the STFU.[15] - over usage of Triple H, it doesnt read well
This feud started on December 26 2005, when Mr. McMahon made note of Bret Hart's DVD and claiming that he "tricked" Hart in the hours of his match at Survivor Series where he lost the WWE Championship to Shawn Michaels, after Michaels applied Hart's own finisher the Sharpshooter and McMahon called for the bell, in an event known as the "Montreal Screwjob" - sentance is too long, it needs spliting.Then Mr. McMahon scheduled a match between him and Michaels, at WrestleMania 22, where the match would be a No Holds Barred match.[27] - over usage on the word match- Before the event started, Goldust defeated Rob Conway in a match that aired on HEAT. Goldust won the match after a powerslam.[29] - shouldnt this go in the background section?
- Masters soon caught on, when he powerbombed Carlito into the turnbuckle. Carlito, however, came out on the winning end when he hit Masters with a Back Cracker and using the ropes for leverage.[30][31] - bring together as a single sentance
Next was a match between Umaga and Ric Flair. Throughout the match Umaga had the upper hand over Flair as he hit a knee to his head. He beat Flair when he hit the Samoan Spike for the win.[31][32] - stubbyThe match started with Shawn Michaels crossbodying both Vince and Shane McMahon on the outside. - the outside of what?- Starting from The sixth match was the section is undersourced.
Mr. McMahon informed the referee to "check" God - which McMahon?As Michaels rose from the aerial technique, Shane hit Michaels with a steel chair, busting Michaels open. - Badly written- The Spirit Squad interfered and attacked Michaels. - stub
- Over wikilinking of names throughout article just link the names once.
Cena and Triple H teamed up and turned against Edge - stub- Things took a brief turn - bad way to start sentance
opening up Triple H's head and releasing blood, afterwards nailing Triple H with a DDT and then turning his focus onto Cena. - informal wording/slang- The match took a turn when the referee was knocked out. - stubby and doesnt really mean very much, clarification needed
- The match came to a conclusion when Cena hit the FU on Edge. - stub
- Cena successfully retained the WWE Championship. - stub
wiki link dates in aftermath section- On the June 12 edition of Raw, McMahon booked Triple H in a Gauntlet match against the Spirit Squad. During the match, it saw Michaels return as part of the storyline. Triple H and Michaels would go on to reform their previous wrestling stable D-Generation X.[50] - join together, quite stuby
- The "results" section is good, very well sourced however its set out wrong, it needs to be set into a written paragraph or made into some sort of table.
- The LEAD is unnessarily sourced, make sure everything that is in the lead is also in the article, then source it in the article, thus you no longer need to source the LEAD.
OK, those are the points i see off hand, also make sure that all stuby sentances are improved and all long sentances are split. Remove all repeat wikilinking. I also think the article user the wrestlers names to often, sometimes swop the name with he/she so long as the sentance still makes sense.
OK, do all that and call me back. Ive put it on hold to let you complete this lot. If you need more than 7 days let me know and ill extend it somewhat. When im called back ill go through it again and hopefully it should by then read perfectly. Cheers. Realist2 (Come Speak To Me) 00:48, 23 May 2008 (UTC)
OK, the article passes, sources are reliable and all work, no original research. Pictures are all free with suitable captions. The article is both Neutral and Stable. Its broad without going off the point. My only concern is for the pros, which while not excellent, should satisfy the requirements of GA. Realist2 (Come Speak To Me) 15:11, 23 May 2008 (UTC)
James
Is James female? I saw two sentences that said "she" and "her".--andreasegde (talk) 09:21, 23 May 2008 (UTC)
- You mean Mickie James? –Cheers, LAX 09:59, 23 May 2008 (UTC)
I mean the James that is referenced in this article (but I'll bet the other one drinks pints... :)--andreasegde (talk) 13:25, 23 May 2008 (UTC)
- Yes, James refers to Mickie James, who is female. We refer to her by her last name. Gavyn Sykes (talk) 13:31, 23 May 2008 (UTC)
I didn't see the link before it. Whoops... (BTW, is she in the category of people that can crack walnuts with their buttocks? :))--andreasegde (talk) 14:46, 23 May 2008 (UTC)
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